Monday, June 30, 2008



oh really, lanvin? "this old thing? it's just the silk blouse i borrowed from my mom. and these? these are just my child-rearing hips. don't they go great with my black lycra cummerbund/arab strap?" but the sunglasses are kinda dope. almost as good as the dries van noten ones which i'm oddly drawn to:


and the marni ones:

frillr.com

this season has kinda sucked (GLOBAL RECESSION!) but the sunglasses have been on point. oh, i heard they're trying to get slimane back to dior. SNORESSSSSS. unless he's broadened his shtick beyond pre-pubescent coke addicts wearing swaths of dark denim, black wool, and glitter, NOT THAT PSYCHED. on a more positive note:

Sunday, June 29, 2008

party was a blast. lots of picture, but here's the gist:


boo!

Friday, June 27, 2008

in case you had any doubt that cropped/cuffed pants and boat shoes wasn't a good look any more, let me assuage all possible doubts:


droopy here doesn't seem to think so. so, by all means, continue dressing like old man river. also, you can't see it here, but while those two other dudes are texting on their iphones or blackberry curves or whatever, that dude is probably reading a printout of a telegram. "purple book after party tonight. stop. meet me at kitsune at 1300. stop. don't forget to take the yellow pill after a MEAL for your heart. stop."
my old apartment is having a party this weekend to celebrate the end of WWI. dudes, we used to have INSANE parties at our apartment when i wasn't yet old. fist fights, shooting bottlerockets out of people's buttcracks, the son of the chair of the guggenheim falling down a flight of stairs, seriously insanity. i hate themed parties as much as the next person, but ours were actually pretty good.

the black history month/president's day jam:


my going away party for when i moved out of the city a couple years ago:


the slow dance party where we just played bone thugz n' harmony and mazzy star's 'fade into you' over and over again:


it makes this flyer pale in comparison:


anyways, dudes, TOTALLY COME on saturday. it'll be sweet. i'll be lily white france, you be rough and gruff germany and we'll make out like our tongues are alsace lorraine.

Thursday, June 26, 2008

i don't know what's gotten into me, but lately on my commute to work, i've only been listening to bands i listened to 10 years ago when i WAS SO ANGRY AT THE WORLD. basically, it's me in biz cas blasting jawbreaker and sunny day real estate in my headphones so EVERYONE CAN TELL THAT I AM RAGING AGAINST THE DYING OF THE LIGHT. i am the ultimate corporate surly teenager.

this:


+

this:

=
me:


DID THAT NO ONE EVER LIVE A LIFE THIS HARDDDDDDDDDDD?? yeah, basically i am the worst. it is like that 40 year old dude i see in my office building sometimes with gray hair, wearing banana republic, with a messenger bag with a bunch of CRASS buttons attached to it. he was on crutches the other day, probably from RAGING SO HARD.

also, this is what blake schwarzenbach looks like now. he teaches writing at hunter. he also dreamed he was a fireman; he just smoked and watched you burn.

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

ummm...i don't think kim jones could get more adorable:
Africa has always been my first love, and I have been visiting it for over 30 years now. I still remember my first experience there, seeing a giant millipede and being too scared to get out of the car, thinking it was a snake.

* * *
I really want to go to Vietnam to see Douc Langurs and Slow Lorises [described in a picture caption as his favorite animal], which is an animal I featured as a print in my Spring/Summer 2007 collection. (I tend to be interested in the weird and wonderful, and that includes my animals!)

* * *

In my spare time I still like to read up on new species, climate change and what’s going on in the natural world. I love National Geographic, Africa Geographic, and my favorite read on a Friday afternoon is the online publication www.wildlifeextra.com.
awwwwww....so cute! i always thought of him as a kind of too-cool fashion nouveau homo-skinhead in the vein of slava mogutin but he's just a big cuddly bear! i love him so much!

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

i just spent the last half an hour reading about nick snider chatting on stickam and showing his ass to teen fashion twinks from ontd_fashinfags. it was kinda really intense. i'm sorry, i'm in a deep, deep gay-hole right now.

ps. i'm pretty sure that in 25 years, no one will know how to spell OR that retarded lolcats will be the harder, better, faster, stronger esperanto. which makes me feel REALLY old. kthxbai!

pps. also, have you guys seen frillr? amazing!

Monday, June 23, 2008

it's very sad that george carlin died today, and i know that the person below might not have the greatest grasp on the english language, but this made me LOL.
man, men's s/s 09 totally snuck up on me. anyways, first thoughts.

jil:


CRAYOLA YELLOW = CRAMAZING. note to self: all primary colors, ALL THE FUCKIN TIME.


sweater? YES.


contempo casuals/merry-go-round bustier built into blazer? NO. it's a little too goth slutty office worker (becky newton from ugly betty).



DEAR GOD YES.


all from men.style.com
NOT SO MUCH.

all-in-all, the usual grab bag. i'll do prada later. also: did anyone else feel that burberry had a kinda demeulemeester lite/jr. thing going on? the stretched proportions, the hats. i'm not saying it didn't look good, but...

OH, but one more thing:

stephen gan? why in god's name are you dressed like maroon 5? you (co-)founded one of the most INFLUENTIAL and amazing magazines of the last 25 years. you are retardedly good, and i'm sure a really really smart dude. oh, and your cameo in that fergie video was GENIUS. seriously:

you can afford not to shop at AA and the sale rack at atrium/le chateau. i know you work real hard to achieve that level of muscled gaysian twinkiness, and it'd be a shame to let it go unseen, hidden under, you know, good clothing. but c'mon!! you're KILLING me here. the only way it could be worse is if you had a fedora on, yoshi madden. but i am kinda REALLY into the 'oldboy' hair you're rocking.

it says, in tandem with your generic gay out-of-work actor/waiter/temping paralegal costume, "yes, i like to hang out at b bar, but at the same time i have been kidnapped and held hostage in a remote location for 5 years of my life and i will take out revenge on my captor whether or not it kills me. also, have you heard the new hercules and the love affair remix? it's MAYYYYJUHHHHH!"

Thursday, June 19, 2008

so we're all in agreement that blasians are the most beautiful people on the face of this earth? cuz, GODDAMN!


meisel for italian vogue

between sessilee*, amerie, and tyson i'm pretty sure that we shouldn't allow any other babies to be born unless they come out in a kimono made of kinte cloth.


dude, chinks for years have known how good this combination is. why you think we serve chicken wings and hot sauce with fried rice at the takeout place? IT'S IN OUR GENETIC MEMORY.

*actually, i'm not sure that she's watermelon bubble tea. but i think we can all agree that making her LOOK asian = GORGEOUS. slant eyes for EVERYONE!!

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

retardanista: DELETEDCOMMENTGATE!

ok, because i'm a total masochist and love reading poorly written regurgitations of press releases by girls who went to lesser ivy's/wellesley and then moved to the city to follow their dreams of working in GLAMOUR! and FASHION! that think they are somehow way cooler than the rest of the girls who wear hideous alice+olivia sack dresses and knock-off gladiators from david z. (when it's so obvious that they are EXACTLY THE SAME) because they've somehow convinced the fashion blogger echochamber that they have clout (?!), i hate-read the "website" fashionista.com.

god, i love when they report on 6 year old trends (moccasins! boat shoes! bakery twine headbands!) breathlessly as if they're letting you in on a HOT NEW LOOK (maybe circa lit 2002) that only their keen eyes have started to notice. AND their constant reports of forever21 knocking off marc jacobs. NEWSFLASH: CHINKS STEAL OTHER PEOPLE IN THE FIRST WORLD'S IDEAS! oh, also, i like when they pretend to think that when people use the word fashionista and employ the ridiculously overused (by latino kids in the 90s, then by emo t-shirt designers in the early 00s) gothic lettering, those people STOLE IT FROM THEM.

don't even get me started on the posted transcripts of their empty-headed rambling set at an artlessly dropped "hot spot":
Faran (over grilled corn at cafe habana): isn't that irina?
Natalie (on her blackberry at santos party house): no, that's, like, just some girl with bangs
Faran (drinking a pink cosmo at smith nights): OMG, I TOTALLY THOUGHT IT WAS HER! [i would go out tonight, but i don't think i have anything much to wear! that is soooo true!]
Natalie (making out with some old pervert with new money in a booth at the waverly): OMG, ME TOO!
[End Scene]
anyways, every once in a while i'll comment when something angers me enough to stir me to action. like this, wherein they comment, among other retardedly pithy observations, as follows:
What we saw last night [at the Whitney Art Party celebrating young, rich retards who still obsess over precious, precocious ink drawings and things littered with dash snow's splooge], in between looking at the art, dancing under the disco ball and stalking Moby:
* * *
- Barbara Bush dancing with Derek Blasberg, who we thought was Jack McCullough of Proenza, but wasn't.
so i commented back and it was published as so:


WHEN IN FACT, they totally cut off my thought! what i actually submitted was this:


apparently they're afraid of the TREMENDOUS POWER derek blasberg yields in the fashion world. like the power to wear a bow-tie and look waterlogged in every wireimage picture i see? who knows. god, i should just stop reading it because it angers up my blood SOOOOO much. or maybe i will just start actively making fun of every retarded entry that sparks my fancy. WHO KNOWS WHAT THE FUTURE HOLDS.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

awwwww...look how cute!

sfgate

adorable! jarvis cocker and costello or tagliapietra (i dunno which) just got married! i can't help it, i just love jarring juxtapositions. high/low, new/old, hardcore porno in rococo frames, bear/twink. it must be from all those years i pretended i was in art school. cognitive dissonance! semiotic tension!

anyways, congratulations, homos!

EDIT: oh! and he has a blog! here's a picture he posted himself:


and video!

awesome, now i can learn where they're registered. adorbs!

Saturday, June 14, 2008

ok, so i'm calling my own bluff and bought them:


and i need you guys to tell me if they're delightfully retarded or retardedly delightful:


are they dries van noten or dries van no-no-noten? i'm kinda thinkin' delightfully retarded. we'll see if they see the light of day or get relegated to the back of my closet with my dignity and my homosexuality as regards to my parents.

Friday, June 13, 2008

i know it's a classic shape and cut and has cultural and (20th century) historical significance way beyond its recent resurgence and is easy design shorthand for connotations of rebelliousness, youth culture, etc., but can we all please lay off the perfecto variations now? pretty please?

pics from men.style.com

dear god, make it stop. when the nytimes style blog has two posts featuring perfecto jackets yesterday AND ONE OF THOSE POSTS IS ABOUT SEAN JOHN, i think people need to consider retiring these for a while.

that means YOU, ribbonface:

Thursday, June 12, 2008

that never even ever really even is in it

raf/raf for jil (s/s 08)



+

proenza schouler (s/s 08)


=

richard chai (resort 09)

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

ok dudes, so the only time i get to watch real music videos (and not that NYNOISE shit that shirleybeans (so twee!) plays on nyctv) is at the gym on the treadmill in the mornings and frequently that shit cracks me up. today i got to see the new NKOTB video and DEAR LORD was it awesome. let's start from the top.

first of all, it starts with them getting "activated" bourne identity/charlie's angel style with someone sending out a text message to all the new kids telling them to SUIT UP!

apparently though using current model phones, they opted to use the same screens that were on cellphones from when they were actually famous for that extra "throw-back" flava.

then it goes to each one of them AROUND THE GLOBE (they're all in miami, apparently) and the camera shows each of them being triple-threat-ivated. WITH THEIR NAMES LABELED IN THE LOWER THIRD SO WE CAN ALL REMEMBER:






who the fuck is jon?! anyways, i never realized how much ugly you can get away with in your (pre)-pubescence. b/c seriously, i don't remember them being this monstrously hideous. this shit might be ok when you're 15, but it is NOT COOL when you're pushing 35:



also, i like how they are pretending that jordan is not a total, flaming, i buy my swim trunks at parke & ronen, i lather my face with spf 30 khiels before i get off the LIRR for the fire island ferry, towleroad-bookmarking homo. (and let's not forget the stomach-pumping cum incident, friends).


because THIS is totally a face/body combo a straight person would make:

"i am so TOTALLY FRUSTRATED with all these beautiful ladies, GUYS!"

no matter how much of a trainwreck the rest of the video is, at least they had the good sense to cordon off the ugly ones to the upper quadrants of the screen:


oh, and the rest of the video is SUCH a trainwreck. they end up going to a bamboo island orgy with pretty girls in earth tone bikinis and sarongs dancing with them (mostly just with joey b/c, somehow, he's the best looking one now?) but that part was boring. my absolute FAVORITE part is when they decide it'd be a good idea to do some charlie's angel: full gay throttle silhouettes in front of a beautiful island sunset.



NOT GAY AT ALL!

and what better way to finish off an earth tone bikini orgy then with some moonlight line dancing.



also, they did some of that arm waving back and forth that was their signature i think? i can't remember. again, i almost broke my neck. and i've officially wasted 45 minutes making this post. BACK TO WORK, GUYZ.